We went to bed very late Friday night so we all woke up late. I made breakfast, chocolate chip pancakes, beans, rice, and eggs. I was watching Lord of the Rings as I was making breakfast, and the kids commandeered my iPad to watch it.

We spent the rest of the day watching movies only Bonnie and I wanted to watch. The kids weren’t very responsible this past week with their chores.

We had fish left over from the night before so we have fish tacos for dinner. Throughout the day and into the night we could hear what sounded like a dog yelping and crying in the dry creek just below our property. I may hike down and check it out tomorrow. Hopefully they have animal control here. We ended the night letting the kids watch the movie Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. They were scared most of the time and I kept telling them they didn’t have to watch it. They persisted, and they are glad I vetoed Bonnie’s choice. She wanted to watch The Sixth Sense. Maybe we can watch that tonight. 😀

I’m writing day 107 on the morning of Day 108. It was a long day and I collapsed in bed around 1230am last jiggly. Or early this morning.

Rent is due and I decided to walk to the bank. It’s a 2 mile walk and it was great getting out of the house. I took the following photos.

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After I got back from that errand, I worked for a while. We had lunch and for the past few days, Bonnie has been helping the kids put a lego set together of Hogwarts. Here is their finished product.

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This last week the kids didn’t do the requisite amount of chores required to get a vote on dinner or entertainment. So I went to the store to buy tilapia, because that’s what we wanted to eat for dinner. I also bought wine because pandemic. The seafood department at the grocery store has a very distingy odor. Maybe because they have the fish out and not covered in glass.

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The wine selection was made by country, instead of type. That was interesting to me. I already have enough scotch for the next two weeks (two bottles).

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We had baked tilapia in a garlic butter sauce, sautéed in coconut oil and garnished with thinly sliced lemons. Brocolli, pesto pasta and ceased salad. The kids hated it. 😂😂😂 and I still made them eat it.

During dinner we zoomed with Bonnie’s side of the family. Her mom’s birthday is May 1 and my wonderful sister in law organized a zoom party. It was nice to see her family, but I stayed downstairs most of the time to clean up the kitchen. Not much worse than the smell of fish lingering all day.

There was leftover tilapia so we are probably going to have fish tacos for lunch on Day 108.

Today is April 30, it is Children’s Day in Mexico. Today children are celebrated in Mexico as important members of this society, and are showered with gifts and candy all day long. I went to the corner store to buy some items and the store owner gave me four lollipops for my kids.

After school, we brought out a lego Hogwarts, and Bonnie spent most of the day helping the kids put it together while listening to the Sorceror’s Stone on audible. We ate pizza and brownies, and had a great time.

The kids like creating their own books and the middle boys worked tirelessly on their own comic books.

Our oldest son was excited about his book and read it to our youngest.

After dinner Bonnie has a dance party upstairs, while I stayed downstairs to wash dishes and sweep the floor. She loves dancing and I prefer quiet so it worked out for both of us. I put the Roomba on ninety minutes ago and it is almost about to finish sweeping our floors. Every time I turn it on I think about the scene in the modern movie “Clash of the Titans” where Zeuss yells “release the Kracken”

I usually say “release the Roomba” to myself and then walk upstairs under the sad realization that I am bored and no one here gets that reference. I’ll leave you all with our Roomba going back to charge itself after sweeping up a days worth of crumbs and dirt from four small children and two adults.

Today I woke up to my youngest child standing over me looking at himself in our mirror, styling his hair. He is very particular about his hair and what he wears.

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I realize I’m getting old because I got excited about the plates my wife bought at the local grocery store.

The plates and bowls are new. We love them, and yes… we are getting a little bored here. I might start trying to learn a new language. Just need to figure out which one.

We bought our plane tickets home in 75 days. It actually made me kinda sad when I bought them. I tried buying tickets in May to come back and deal with office work and mail at home. But the price to fly home in May costs a couple thousand dollars with at least two stops. I’d have to fly from here to Dallas, then fly to Seattle, and the Oakland. With hours, and hours in between all flights. So, I will wait another month before I come back. The reason I fly back isn’t just for work but to bring items back that we don’t want to bring back on our final flight home. I’ll have my chance in June.

Tomorrow is Kids Day in Mexico. Evidently it is a huge holiday, my wife says it’s bigger than Mother’s Day which is baffling to me. So tonight I’m baking brownies for the kids for tomorrow.

Today I appeared for the first time in court over zoom. It was an abatement petition brought by the city of Vallejo I was opposing on a probate I was hired on at the 11th hour before a home was sold by the county for lack of payment of property taxes. Sorry for the run on sentence. Clients usually hire probate lawyers too late, and homes get lost because property taxes aren’t paid. This is very common and tragic. I was able to convince the judge to give us over 60 days for my client to clean up the abatement and sell the property.

After that I cleaned the entire second floor, did a ton of laundry and made lunch and dinner. Lunch was home made chicken soup and grilled ham and cheese. For dinner I made pork chops, scalloped potatoes and asparagus. Yesterday we had a huge thunderstorm, I’ll post pics of the aftermath below. One bolt of lightning hit a hundred feet from our house.

Today marks a milestone I wasn’t thrilled to hit. My mom has been gone for twenty years. I’m married to a doctor of clinical psychology, who has a huge amount of experience in neuropsychological testing. She has admitted to me that she has never met someone with a better memory. It’s a photographic memory, I can recall conversations verbatim from 15 years ago, and for the life of me I barely remember my mom.

Growing up, I was what you’d call a lazy student. My grades hovered around C’s and B’s. I rarely got an A. I rarely made honor roll (getting a B average) and only once got scholarship 9a B+ average. I remember I was in fifth grade when I made scholarship, when my teacher, Ms. Bangerter (Ms. Wiborn now), came up to me and hugged me and said I made it. I remember working very hard that semester. Skip forward so many years, my junior year. I had a huge crush on a girl who was a grade below me. I asked her out to my junior prom as friends (she was dating someone at the time). My mom took me to get my tux, and helped me pick out a corsage. She made a huge to do about the whole thing even though we were friends. After the prom when me and this girl remained friends I came home sad and my mom comforted me, and said to be patient. She even took this photo of me with some nieces and my youngest cousin (who is all grown up and an amazing teacher and mother of twins no less!!!!!!!)

I remained patient and six months later I was dating that girl. I didn’t come out and say we were dating but I said I was heading to her house for dinner and my mom said “why?” and she gave me that look like she knew I was hiding something, and even though I can keep a straight face, I just couldn’t keep the smile off my face. She hugged me and said, “make sure to invite her over for dinner sometime”. This new girlfriend of mine was a 4.3 gpa student. She was an over achiever, did a ton of activities, volunteered with Special Olympics and was trying to learn a foreign language. I have no clue what she saw in me. Hanging around her family it was clear her siblings were over achievers as well, academically her parents expected perfection and they got it. Her brother is an engineer (with a masters degree) and her sister is a chiropractor. Being around these people, I felt unworthy of dating this girl because I had bad grades and didn’t have any future plan for anything.

This was my senior year of high school and it went by in a flash. I got into my community college and decided to devote my college experience to academics like a passion. It was there I became close to one of my high school friends named Juan. And reconnected with one of my old Sunday school friends from New Life Christian, Stuart. We were just a bunch of idiots trying to get through junior college. My first semester grades were straight A’s. When I got my grades it was like getting punched in the stomach, i didn’t know it was even possible to get those grades. My girlfriend was excited, my mom was proud. It was a great time in my life, my job as a courtesy clerk was paying all my expenses, tuition, gas, some food, car insurance. I felt great.

A day after one of my sisters had her second child (we are a fertile group of siblings) my mom had a seizure in her bed. The fire dept came, and an ambulance took her to the hospital. I drove with my dad because he was worried I’d crash o the way there. They did a bunch of testing, I went home for the night and my dad stayed there. The next morning I went to an early class and then headed to the hospital. As I got off the elevator there were some of my mom’s friends and a couple of my sisters I think. My dad was waiting for me, time stood still, he walked up to me and said “Georgie it’s cancer” he hugged me and the next few weeks were blur.

I kept working at the local grocery story, in the small town we live in knew about my mom the next day it seemed. All these people I barely know would ask how my mom was as I bagged their groceries, I’d habitually run to the bathroom to cry for a few minutes and then walk back when the tears dried. I hated those people who asked me about my mom, because most of them forgot my answer after they left. She would have to have brain surgery to remove a tumor on her brain.

I’ll spare you all the details of the next two years. The cliff notes version is that I kept dating that girl, and kept getting straight A’s. The other constant was my mom’s health kept deteriorating. I dreamed of getting into UC Berkeley, it ended up being my dream school, close to home and prestigious. My girl friend had already gotten in from high school, and between working, and studying and caring for my mom, I’d try to visit her at her sorority house. I would be exhausted though from everything I’d been doing and would end up falling asleep when I got there. My glimmer of hope was UC Berkeley sending out my acceptance, they send them out by mail on May 1. I had already gotten into UC Davis, but I wanted Berkeley.

On April 27, 2000 my sister Amy called my cell phone frantically saying she’s having trouble breathing. For extra money I tutored students in college statistics and left abruptly from tutoring and sped home. She was having trouble breathing, my mom had a nurse named Minnie, who was a tough as nails older women who didn’t take any crap from anyone. She was an angel that last year, she cared so deeply for my mom. My dad, my sister Amy (who is a nurse practitioner now) Minnie, and myself were at my mom’s hospital bed. I’m not going to go too much into details, my cursed memory won’t let me forget every minute detail of what came next. She passed away at 1:08pm, Minnie closed her eyes. Everyone was sobbing, and a few moments later my dad calmed down a little and turned to Minnie and said “Minnie… you’re fired.” It made us laugh a little. Everyone around her bed was exhausted, we were tired, it was over. That day, the senior pastor of a church in Castro Valley came to our house to pray, and mourn with us. I was vaguely familiar with him. His name is Larry, my mom’s best friend asked him to come over.

My mom told me stories about what happened when her dad died when she was 7. She told me that you learn a lot about your family when a parent dies. No truer words have been spoken. I spent the last two years watching my dad mourn a dying wife, he’d go into a room away from her and cry. My dad was one of the dad that people just didn’t fuck with. Sorry for the language, but he was a well known Teamster in Oakland, and he was and is tough as nails. And I watched him break over the course of two years. I had many conversations with my sister Amy, we were certain he’d be dead in a year. He didn’t have great health, and men are weaker then women, we were resigned to the fact that he’d be gone very soon after our mom went.

A couple days after she died we had a wake at our local Catholic church. The church was packed, the priests were turning people away. There was a traffic jam outside in all directions. My mom was loved. I had gotten my acceptance letter to UCLA that morning, the mail lady knew my name and knew what I was waiting for every day, she was excited to hand me the large envelope. That evening I told my family that I got in, and I also said I’m not announcing it during my talk because tonight was about my mom and not me, and that it’s arrogant to say I got into UCLA. My Uncle Rick took me aside and said “George, you need to tell everyone you got in, there’s no conceit in achievement”. I’ll never forget that. And After I gave my eulogy of my mom, I said today I got into UCLA, and a huge surprised hush fell over the crowd. I’m glad I said I got into UCLA because years later people would run into me and ask how UCLA was, and those were the people I’d know didn’t stay in contact with my family. I didn’t go to UCLA, that was a safety school.

My dad ended up dating sooner than family and “friends” were comfortable. I was thrilled, but others were not, and they made there opinion known. It seemed that the entire small town we lived in had turned their backs on my dad quickly. That was more painful then losing my mom. My dad was in three tours in Viet Nam, he lost many of his best friends. He had to mourn them fast and then concentrate on being alert and not dying. It was there I’m sure he developed his mourning process. He was dating, and my sister and I were happy for him. Everyone else wasn’t. That stung. I understand now that they were being loyal to their dead friend, but they were hurting her children who were alive. I only consider three of my mom’s many friends to be true friends of hers. One of her true friends died a few months before she did of liver failure, her name was Ginger, and she was a saint.There are a couple others I have deemed in my book to be true friends of my moms, they should know who they are. The others I’ve disowned in my heart as close friends of my mom’s. They never were close to her in my book. They were gossips, and frauds.

I ended up getting in to UC Berkeley. I ended up marrying that girl I started dating my senior year of high school. I even ended up having four kids of my own. Having kids gave me a better perspective on life. A parent dying before a child is the natural order and is expected. My poor grandma lost two husbands and my mom, my grandma died in her 90s, and had a very hard life. Now I see my mom dying when I was 20 wasn’t the worst thing in the world. I just wish I could remember her more. I wish she could have seen me get into my dream school, and marry my dream girl.

So as a type of epilogue thus far. I am happily married to that girlfriend, still close friends with Juan (Now Dr. Juan who is a doctor who specializes in emergency medicine, Stuart was the best man at my wedding). We are living a couple miles from Juan’s parents in Mexico. My dad is also very alive and happily married to a saint. We have been attending that church in Castro Valley since Larry showed up to our house that afternoon that changed everything of April 27, 2000.

The following photos are all the photos I have of her. I’ve asked some friends and family if they have any photos with no real response. Even though I know they do have photos of her, I’m not going to bother with it anymore. These photos are all I have left. I’m 40 now, having lived longer without my mom then with her, I thought today would be easier. My mom’s friend Marsha walked up to me and hugged me after my mom’s wake she told me “Georgie it only gets harder now” and that made me smile. Of the hundreds of people spouting boring hallmark phrases at me as they left my mom’s wake, one person told me the truth. And she was right.

Today we had online church and a great breakfast. I made bacon and eggs with toast instead of tortillas. It’s been a long time since we had toast, and the kids devoured it. They almost forgot what toast was.

We ate lunch during the church service our home church in Castro Valley. We made fish sticks and Mac and cheese with carrots. Some of the kids didn’t touch their food so Bonnie and I decided to die on that hill for dinner. The kids were not pleased but 75% of them ate their food to get s’mores for dessert. You can guess which one still refused to eat, we share first names.

Today was a lazy day. We had eggs and chorizo for breakfast with refried beans and rice. Of course no breakfast here is complete without tortillas hot off the stove. After breakfast I promised our third child he could play an hour on the Nintendo Switch. For lunch we had cheese and crackers. The last time we went to the grocery store will be three weeks this coming Monday. So we are trying to stretch it out until this Monday. I forgot to mention a funny conversation I had with my youngest a couple days ago when we went to the city center.

He demanded that I carry him back to the car. This was easily a mile away. I told him I’ve been carrying him for four years and maybe he should carry me. His response “how old are you dad?” I say “I’m 40”. He then says “ok I’m four years old.” So I say “so?” Then he says “since you admitted that you are older and bigger, you should always be the one to carry me.” Successfully cross examined his lawyer father.

Our youngest had been a little loud about his upcoming birthday in two weeks so his older siblings made him a surprise tea party in one of their rooms. Below is a video of his older siblings surprising him. They really love him and spoil him when they can. *

We made it to triple digits. Today is day 100. It’s Friday and we tried to go back to a regular school day but the kids weren’t really having it. Later on one of our kids first grade classes on zoom ended early and the teacher wanted to have a meeting with the parents.

The other parents were having the same issues we were, so we didn’t feel too useless after that meeting. During the day I took the following two photos of our kids. I don’t remember hanging out with my older siblings like this, and my memories have been a little stunted for other reasons we will get to on Day 103. It was nice even for a few minutes to see our kids enjoying themselves in peace, the peace didn’t last very long. It was one of those times I saw it happening and I quickly brought my phone out to take photos of it.

We also want to send a special shout out to my children’s 1st Grade teacher. I won’t share her name on here for privacy reasons, but our first three children had her as a first grade teacher. If you ever met her you’d know she was programmed at birth to be a teacher, she exudes it. All the teachers at our kids school are very special and great at their jobs, but particularly our first grade teacher. Today was her birthday, so happy 29th birthday if you’re reading this. 😀😀😀 Can’t wait for you to teach child 4.

I got 99 days but a…. Sorry I couldn’t help myself. Today we had to get out of the house. Our house keeper took the month off to shelter in place and called recently to see if we needed her to come over. We needed her to come over.

So instead of homeschooling the kids all day, we took them out of our house so our housekeeper could clean up. We treated it like a field trip, and had all four kids give a report on four different historic buildings in city center.

The video below is of us driving into the city center.

We were starving because we didn’t eat breakfast, so we actually found a restaurant, the restaurant was empty so we felt comfortable taking our masks off.

We walked by the Diego Rivera museum on the way to breakfast.

After we finished breakfast, we walked to the University to see the building. And we ran into an older man who gave us a talk about the university. We tipped him of course.

We walked down a street and got to the famous basilica the city is known for. There, our third child gave a talk about it and read from an article in Spanish, explaining it to his very interested siblings.

We walked down the road and had some ice cream before walking through downtown to go home. I had tres leches ice cream and oddly it tastes nothing like it, but it did taste exactly like dead bread. Dead bread is a bread you bring with you on the day of the dead to eat while you are honoring your loved ones who have passed away. It has a doughy cinnamon taste and the bread is commonly shaped like a dead person with their arms crossed as if they are laying in a coffin. We walked through my favorite square in downtown. Usually it is packed with people and restaurants that are open. Today it was empty.

We walked further up the road and made it to the Museum de Regional something. George gave us a lecture on it, this museum was very old. The conquistadores would kill intellectuals and place their heads at the four corners of this building. Our kids are getting an amazing experience here.

We then got into our car and drove home. The next few videos are us driving through the many tunnels n this city.

The noise in these videos are my children. This is what we hear when we drive our kids around. This noise is constant, it doesn’t end. We got home, immediately threw our clothes in the wash and made the kids shower. Then they wanted to wear some eye masks with cucumbers on them. I don’t know either.

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We ordered out for sushi. So if I don’t update this blog for a few days, I either have terrible food poisoning, or I died.

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The rest of the photos are a gallery from the whole day, I am tired of posting videos. *

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